Nine days…

Nine days…today I am feeling pretty good. I would almost say I was feeling Zen-like. I am quite calm about everything…well, except the state of my daughter’s bedroom, which we are now cleaning fervently. Maybe that is why I am not worrying about what I am going to be doing in nine days; I am up to my belly button in Littlest Pet Shop and Polly Pockets.

I have been trying to get my daughter to purge the toys she no longer plays with for quite some time. She has put it off saying, “but I play with that mommy” and commences to play with said toy for a few days before I find it lying under her bed again. However, something clicked with her today (maybe it was the threat of me making the decision of what stays and what goes) and she is donating up a storm. She has already passed off several things to our neighbors (sorry Heather, but better your house than mine!).  She is actually enjoying the ridding of the things that have weighed her down.

OK. I know – how can a 7-year-old feel weighed down? Because sometimes less is more, but for a 7-year-old more is what matters and she is weighed down by what she doesn’t have more than with what she does have. That is a hard lesson to teach. It is hard saying no to her when she wants something her friend has. So, since she can’t get the new DS or an iPod like her friend, she hangs on to what she does have – being able to compare the amount of what she has to the actual merchandise her friend has…she might not have the most expensive toys, but she has lots of them; even if all the pieces aren’t there, they are broken or she hasn’t played with them in years.

So, what does this have to do with me? Well, it is all about de-cluttering my mind of the comparisons I tend to make between myself and the people around me…the comparisons that weigh me down. These comparisons are like the toys I don’t play with – they don’t matter, they are just there because being able to say someone is better than me is almost an excuse to stop, or not push myself to where I know I can go.

I am a strong cyclist, but not as strong as she is. How can she make it look so effortless to climb that hill when I look and feel like I am dying?

She is a much better runner than I am, I can’t even keep up. I may as well just walk.

Wow! Look at how fast she is going. Look at how good her stroke is. I can’t swim that well. I’ll never be able to swim like that.

There are going to be hundreds of people around me during the triathlon. There are going to be hundreds of people who are going to be faster or stronger than I am. But, there are also going to be hundreds of people that I am faster and stronger than. It doesn’t matter. Those thoughts are for right now, and not for race day. In fact, I am going to pack them away in Sunshine’s donation bag and get rid of them, because cluttering my life with comparing what I have/don’t have against what someone else has or doesn’t have simply weighs me down and makes going through the motions that much more difficult.

So, today is about getting rid of the things I don’t need to carry with me during the triathlon. De-cluttering always makes me feel better about the space I am in, whether it is de-cluttering the area around me, or my mind. So, right now I am feeling in a pretty good space, as I let go of those comparisons I have been carrying around with me.

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