We should know better, but we try anyway…
Matt and I have been together for nearly 20 years. We know each other VERY well. So, we should have known that having Matt teach me how to change a tire wasn’t going to be the sweetest moment in our relationship. It wasn’t horrible…what was horrible was when he tried to teach me how to ski. F-bombs were thrown around at 8,000 feet on a mountain in Utah.
Anyway, changing tires is not something that comes easily to me. My tire is really hard to get off because of some stupid wire that hooks in the rim…whatever. So, I struggled over and over again with it. Yes. I am sure I snapped a few times in my frustration when Matt tried to help or re-explain something. Then I started crying because I couldn’t get the stupid tire off and then Matt was mad at me.
Then he went away and I did it. I got it off! I did it over and over again – some attempts were better than others. Some simply sucked and made me start crying all over again. (It is really hard to see when you are crying, so that didn’t help any.)
Pretty soon, things were going along well. My hands were dirty. I knew how to take both the front and back tires off; I figured out that with some patience I could make it work. I learned to stand over my tire instead of stand in front of it. I can change a tire!
It isn’t like Matt is a bad teacher, or that I am a bad student…it is that we are too close. Not everyone knows this about me, but I like being able to do things and do things well and when I can’t, I get frustrated. REALLY frustrated. (OK. EVERYONE knows that about me!) So, that is my hang up. I get frustrated and snap at Matt, who then gets frustrated with me. But, there is something else there too, I think.
Matt has always been my protector and when things upset me, or don’t work for me, he often jumps in and makes things better for me. It is one of the things I love about him – I know that with him things will be OK. Every girls wants a knight in shining armor, and that is Matt for me.
What upset me the most about having such a difficult time changing the tire was that it wasn’t something Matt could do for me. If I get a flat on the course, I can’t call Matt (or anyone else) to swoop in and save me, and that is a scary feeling…that moment when one has to be FULLY reliant upon one’s self.
So, as a couple we made it through the changing of the tire – the changing of responsiblity. It was a changing of the guard – sometimes I have to be responsible for protecting myself. With tire changing, it is a responsibility I am ready for – I should be considering I have been riding now for three years!
Thank you Matt! You are the best!